Too Much Information

I'm a relatively smart person and I understand that in reality, I am not the first person to ever stay in the hotel room that I have most recently checked into. But despite my firm grasp on reality, I prefer to conceptually believe that before my arrival, this room somehow ceased to exist and was magically summoned into being simply as a direct result of my very own personal need for out-of-town accommodation. I don't want to think about what the bedspread looks like under a black light and I don't want to contemplate that the housekeeping staff may have wiped down the drinking glasses with the same cloth he/she used to wipe the bathroom floor (or worse, the toilet).

Frankly, I don't want ANY evidence to be lingering around that anyone else has even ever SEEN this room, let alone STAYED in it.

Housekeeping, I implore you, please empty the trash cans BEFORE new guests arrive.

EW!