Year in Review

Happy Anniversary to me! Exactly one year ago today, I arrived in New York… without a return ticket in hand. That’s right, October 29, 2006 was the day I gave Special K a fierce hug at the Long Beach airport, said “See you in three weeks for Thanksgiving!”, and boarded a Jet Blue flight (the first of what would turn out to be MANY) to head east for my new adventure in Gotham.

So, now that I’ve been here a year, let’s review a few of the highlights:

• Have lost all modesty about other people seeing (and touching) my skivvies and now regularly send all my laundry out for washing.

• Got food poisoning within my first week in New York (on the day the movers arrived with my truckload of stuff from California, thank you very much) – and have not had Thai food since.

• Have cooked a proper meal in my apartment exactly once. (In spite of the food poisoning, I continue to eat out … all the time.)

• Have seen P. Diddy a few times when I’ve happened to pass by his office building just as he’s coming or going. (I see his Maybach with much more regularity.) Have also seen a handful of other celebs, including Andy Rooney, Wanda Sykes and my personal favourite – Rupert from the Hello Deli.

• Have learned that I can live quite comfortably in 650 square feet and there are a lot of items that we think we need, but we really don’t. But I still want a bigger place and a yard so I can get a dog.

• Have adopted “New York Time” – I walk everywhere faster and have even caught myself getting unnecessarily impatient when the tourists in front of me in line at the corner deli are taking a bit too long to order their sandwiches.

• Finally learned that “on line” does not mean “online”; it means “in line”, as in “I’ve been standing on line for hours at TKTS”, not “You can’t order tickets online from TKTS”.

• Have seen a ton of shows, both on and off Broadway including some gems such as Mamma Mia, The Producers, The Drowsy Chaperone, The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee, Spamalot, The Scene, Avenue Q, Altar Boyz… the list goes on.

• Reconnected Special K with a high school friend who is now a successful actor. (Special K’s brother and I stalked Chris in the theater lobby after a show, and shocked the you-know-what out of Special K when I handed my cell phone over to Chris and had him say ‘hi’.)

• Broke a number of heels on shoes… and as a result, have rediscovered shoe repair shops… and flats.

• Logged approximately 12 trips back to California (so far), traveling almost 60,000 miles on those trips alone.

• Made “friends” with the construction crew up the street since I walk by every day to go to work. Started pretending to be on my cell phone when I walked by so my new “friends” would stop “chatting” with me.

• Had the unbelievable fortune of being selected as a “Dove Girl” for a Dove Hair advertorial and viral video.

• In the last mile of the New York Marathon, saw a guy get down on bended knee and propose to his girlfriend who he was running with. She said yes.

• Was quoted in Women’s Wear Daily.

• Had a number of fun rendezvous with Special K in Chicago, Dallas, Calgary and New Mexico.

• Was one of many victims of the Valentine’s Day Massacre – was stranded in New York over President’s Day long weekend because of severe snow and ice storms that started on Feb 14.

• Discovered that the two best food deals within a block of my office are the combo deals at Café Metro and at Subway. Discovered that the worst deal is the $3.50 bottles of Vitamin Water in the café in the base of my building.

• Bought more winter clothes than I have in 10 years.

• Promoted into a new role at work.

• Most importantly, have made lots of great new friends and have rekindled a few old friendships as well.

• And I saw a man poop in the street. What more could I possibly ask for??

Guess Who Called Today...

... to tell me that they regretted to inform me that they would be unable to keep the appointment they had scheduled with me today? That's right, the Useless Cable Company! How did you guess?? Ugh. They are now rescheduled to come tomorrow, but I am not holding my proverbial breath.

Charles Atlas is Alive and Well on the West Side!

My building, like many apartment buildings in New York, has quite an electic, random collection of doormen and porters who monitor the building's comings and goings and overall operations. The entire staff is extremely pleasant and friendly, but over the past year, I've definitely gotten to know some of their, um, quirks.

One of the porters, Randy, has worked here since the buidling opened last year when I moved in.

He speaks like a machine gun, rapidly firing off a dozen questions and comments as one single sentence and doesn't stop until it's time to breathe and reload a new magazine of verbal ammunition.

"Hi,HowYouDoingToday?Good,Thanks!That'sRight,NiceToSeeYou,HopeYourDayWasGood, TakeCareOfYourselfNow!"

At the end of this barrage, you have no idea what you should say so you end up just saying "Hi!" and stumbling off to the elevator.

Somehow (I guess I managed to actually fight my way into the conversation properly) I have learned that Randy works out. A lot. No, I mean, A LOT. Like 5 hours each day. He lives in Brooklyn and sometimes rides his bike to work (depending on where he lives in Brooklyn, this is probably at least a 10 - 12 mile ride. THEN, he tells me that he's starting RUNNING to work. That's right, all the way from Brooklyn. Not only does he run, but he runs with a weight vest... because running a half-marathon each day is just not quite enough exercise on its own.

And I can barely drag my sorry butt downstairs to the gym three or four times per week.

IPTV on its Way

Well, after calling Useless Cable Company back and getting a different customer service rep on the phone, I have somehow managed to negotiate myself an "upgraded" cable/phone/internet package that gets me more (but useless) TV channels and I will actually be paying less per month. Sweet. Cable guy is supposed to come tomorrow to switch out my receiver (good bye satellite cable forever) and hook me up to IPTV. Given the cable company's poor track record, please wish me luck.

I Want my IPTV

Or maybe not.

I am not happy with my cable provider at the moment. I think we are literally the ONLY building in Manhattan that does not have a contract with the tried and true cable provider, Time Warner.

Since I moved in, I have had an "issue" with my satellite cable no less than once every six weeks or so. Generally, these "issues" take the form of me being greeted by a blue screen (yes, it's a bad omen for more than just computers) that happily proclaims "No satellite signal". I do all the things I'm supposed to do: turn the TV off and back on, try to walk through the little (read: completely freaking useless) troubleshooting tutorial on the screen, and finally, go for the full "hard reboot" by yanking the entire power supply out of the wall for a few minutes.

Inevitably, I wind up on the phone to the customer service department saying "Just look in my file -- it's the same thing that happened last time."

So, the day before I took my last trip to CA, I turned on the TV for some background noise while I was packing and was faced with the ominous blue screen again. I upheld my part of the script while on the phone with a customer service rep and patiently obliged her in the slow dance of "did you unplug the receiver from the wall?" until she finally said "we'll send someone out first thing in the morning".

I went to work, the Useless Cable Company came to "fix" my cable, I came home from work to pick up my suitcase and flicked on the TV and actually got a picture... happy enough with that, I turned the TV off again and headed out the door to the airport.

Fast forward 10 days when I arrive back in NY. Last night, I turn on the TV to catch the late news and I find that I can't change channels, I can't get the satellite menu to come up and and venturing anywhere off of CBS gives me nothing but static. Sighing, I resignedly dial Useless Cable Company's customer service number (which I have now memorized via frequency of use) and explain the situation to the rep on the other end.

He asks me to try a few things, none of which have any impact, and then he asks my favorite question: "Are you sure the receiver is actually on?" I reply with "yes, it is", but it takes all my willpower not to say something like "On? Darlin', isn't this one of those fancy little HY-bred do-hickeys that runs on banana peels and solar power?" (Side note: It drives me nuts when people say "hybred" instead of "hybrid".)

THEN, Wayne from customer service proceeds to tell me that the package I've been paying for on my monthly bill isn't even a package they offer. Wha? Apparently, at some point over the past few months, Useless Cable Company has converted my building to a fibre optic cable service (that's the IPTV reference), but no one bothered to notify me. And not only that, but now I only have two package options. One is that I can pay the same I pay now, but get 130 fewer channels, OR I can pay twice as much as I pay now for every channel under the sun.

Or I guess there is actually one more option. I can make NO changes and watch anything I want -- as long as it's on CBS.

Have Gun(n), Will Travel

Armed with little more than a laptop and rollerboard suitcase, I am the ultimate corporate road warrior these days. Unfortunately, the accumulation of frequent flyer miles doesn't exactly compensate for a lot of the nightmares that occur when traveling. Here's a snapshot of the first part of my current trip:

-- Nearly tossed my cookies upon arriving at JFK airport (from Manhattan) last week on my way out of NY. Had a particularly jerky driver (commentary on his driving style, not necessarily on his personality overall) and by the time he jerked and swerved his way to the airport, my stomach was ready to do some swerving of its own. Blasted into the terminal to the nearest bathroom only to discover, that's right, a LINE. (Imagine THAT -- a waiting line for a women's restroom!) Managed to hang onto my cookies (barely), but not without the whole nauseous incident converting itself into the sweats and a splitting headache.

-- Six hours later, arrive in San Diego and drive to my hotel. Park in the designated parkade (that's "parking structure" for my American friends) and come up the elevator only to find myself in the lobby of an office building and my hotel is literally a quarter mile away. Did I mention I now have not eaten anything for about 12 hours?

-- Finally get to my room and open my suitcase only to find that my bags have been completely ransacked by shady airline/airport/TSA staff and yes, items have been stolen.

-- Spend the next 45 minutes on the phone with various airline and airport personnel railing about the general state of the human condition (particularly that of the lowlife who invaded my personal space and stole my personal things) and demanding that SOMEONE be held accountable for their employee's criminal actions. I am assured that it is very helpful that I have reported the incident (what ELSE would I have done??) because it helps them narrow down what shifts these "incidents" are occurring on and ostensibly which of their shady employees is running a theft ring behind baggage carousel number one. (I still have not eaten.)

-- Calm down enough to finally crawl into bed in the wee hours of the morning and grab a fitful few hours of sleep.

-- Retrace my steps in the morning in order to find my car and find myself in a part of the parkade that does not look remotely familiar and my eco-friendly Prius rental is nowhere to be found. Even though I was nearly delirious with hunger the night before when I arrived, I made special note of where I was parked and even noted the number of the space I was in. I trudged back up to the lobby and demanded the clerk on duty to tell me what, pray tell, had become of parking space #114 since 11:00 the night before. As it turned out, they had closed off an entire section of the garage with a giant garage door and I wasn't losing my mind -- the Prius was exactly where I left it, but I just couldn't get to it using the previous night's route.

-- I get in the Prius, miraculously find my way out of the Hall of Mirrors parkade, only to discover that my failsafe GPS can't find any satellite signals to hook me up to. I can nearly picture Stella (this is the name I have christened the female GPS voice with) tipping back in her chair, throwing her feet up on the desk, lighting a cigarette and after the first deep inhale, shaking her head and saying, "Sorry, sweetheart, you're on your own now."

Gone to the Dogs

Why did I rent an orange Mitsu Eclipse and wander off into rural Pennsylvania, you ask? Why, to go to a dog show, of course!

As many of you know, my Mom is an extremely well-known and accomplished breeder of Miniature Schnauzers (aw!!) and she made the pilgrimage to PA for the weekend for one of the biggest show weekends of the season. Since she was so close, I went down to visit her and her friend, Heather, for the day.

When I was little, I used to travel with my Mom to shows quite often, but up until last weekend, I hadn't been to one in well over ten years. It was fun to watch the proceedings and field emails from friends who all wanted to know "Is it REALLY like that movie 'Best in Show'?"

Best of all was getting to see my Mom stateside and to have the opportunity to see another good family friend, Joan, whom I haven't seen in over 15 years.

Pic above is from the Miniature Schnauzer ring at the Montgomery County show.

Gettin' My Drive On NYC-Style

Drum roll, please.

Are you ready for this?

I have now driven in New York.

That's right, I have actually been behind the wheel of a car myself as opposed to just popping into the back seat of a cab. And mostly, it was fine. Except that most of the routes to the Lincoln Tunnel were blocked and it took me 20 minutes just to get out of the city. That and the fact that my GPS system was getting a tiny bit frustrated with me. (Calmly: "Turn left in 2oo yards." Then more insistently: "TURN LEFT NOW." Then with annoyed resignation: "Missed turn. Recalculating route." She refrained from adding "idiot!" to the last comment.)

Avis hooked me up with a pumpkin orange (festive, right?) Mitsubishi Eclipse and I have to admit it was fun getting behind the wheel of something nimble and sporty again.

But the key lesson learned? A GPS system is key. I drove down to a little town in Pennsylvania, just to the northwest of Philadelphia and even in the daylight, I feel like I would have missed at least a couple of turns were it not for my trusty little electronic companion anchored to the dash. And coming back at night in the dark? Fugeddaboudit. Seriously, I suppose it's mostly because I'm not familiar with the area, but I really felt like the roads (even the highways) were not all that well marked.

Funniest GPS moment? On the way home at about 9:00 at night, I'm sitting in bumper-to-bumper traffic snaking my way down the long winding entrance to the Lincoln Tunnel, barely inching my way forward when Ms. GPS pipes up in her infinitely chipper tone, "There is a better route available!" Well, unless is has to do with this Eclipse having teleporting capabilities or unless there is a helicopter immediately above ready to pluck me out of the traffic snarl, I think I'm sticking with the original route.

Weird Day

I don't know what was going on today. Everything felt a little off kilter. I felt lethargic and tired all day. I was yawning before the clock even struck 10:00 am. When I got back from lunch, I felt like I could have easily passed out for a two-hour nap.

Walking home from work tonight, it felt like the city was grittier and dirtier than usual. There was more garbage on the streets and people seemed to be in fouler moods than normal. There seemed to be an abnormally large number of dogs barking at frantic pitches and a heightened level of sirens piercing the evening air.

AND to top it all off, I walked by a policeman (yes, a POLICEMAN) who had just finished relieving himself against a tree and was zipping up. Are you KIDDING me?? He would ARREST others for less than that. New York's finest indeed.

(The one redeeming thing about the day, however, was the absolutely spectacular sunset... the entire city and the Hudson River were positively glowing.)

Jersey Girls

On Saturday afternoon, Jess and I met at Penn Station and "train-pooled" out to Maplewood, NJ to Kate's house for a fun Oktoberfest party. Kate and Evan had thought of everything from the wide variety of German beer to the polka music playing in the background.

I feel like such a bad Canadian when I go to parties like this because I don't particularly like beer. I end up drinking wine and I know that's not exactly on point for an Oktoberfest party.

Funniest part of the night? We were starting to get ready to leave to catch our train back into the city when one of the guys told Jess she couldn't leave until she'd had another glass of red wine. In his slightly inebriated state, he came back with a glass of rosé instead and didn't even notice as three of us polished off the glass and handed it back to him empty. He simply looked at the empty glass and then looked up at Jess in awe.

Please Kindly Curb Your Homeless

There are signs all over the streets of New York that say "Please curb your dog" or "Thank you for caring to curb your dog". I've heard a few variations on what it actually means, but apparently the general gist is that when you're walking your dog, you should keep the dog close to the curb so that we he relieves himself, it's not in the middle of sidewalk where every passerby could walk through it (or the remains of it).

So, this morning, I was walking to work along one of my regular routes... it was just before 8:00, so the sidewalks were bustling with activity. As I approached the corner of 57th and 9th, I was walking under some scaffolding in front of the building and I caught a whiff of something extremely foul-smelling.

A few more steps and the scaffolding cut away to my right and in the split second before I could turn away, I saw an image that nearly made me retch and will unfortunately be burned in my brain for quite some time.

A homeless man had his pants down around his ankles, was in a squatting position, and was defacating quite shamelessly in the middle of the sidewalk. Ironically, he actually had the mental wherewithal to position himself over a sheet of newspaper like a semi-housetrained puppy.

I'm sorry, but did I say I missed New York??

NYC's Got Its Hooks In Me

When I moved here last year, I just knew I was coming to NY for a great new job and I didn't really know how it would all play out. I have always really liked the city, but I didn't have a clue about what it would be like to actually live here. I have mostly really loved it (except for snow storms that make the entire eastern half of the US grind to a halt) and when I was back in California on my last trip (for about 10 days), something very unexpected happened.

I starting missing New York.

It may have had to do with the fact that all my stuff is here, my permanent office is here etc and while I'm on the road, I feel like a bit of a corporate gypsy. But I think more than that, it had to do with the energy of the city and the availability of SO much to see and do at any given point in time. Plus, I've met some pretty incredible people here and that becomes a big part of the equation.

(And it doesn't hurt that it was about 80 degrees today and it's OCTOBER, for crying out loud.)

But don't kid yourself, priority number one is to spend as many days as possible in the same zip code as Special K and you know that as winter approaches, those zip codes will increasingly begin with the number 9.

If you need me, I'll be in the Hamptons, Dahling

So, after nearly a year in New York, I had still never been to Long Island. Technically, I'd been on the land mass that contains Long Island because of my numerous trips to JFK and LGA. But I'd never ventured beyond the air traffic controlled part of Nassau County until this past weekend. And then, I ended up going twice! (Making up for lost time, I guess.)

On Saturday, Nick, Reny (and wee Ryan), Sia (and puppy, Tad) and I piled in the car and headed out of the city to Cold Springs Harbor on Long Island. We packed the car with munchies and supplies as if we were embarking on a bona fide road trip instead of just a 35-mile jaunt outside the city.

We arrive in Cold Springs Harbor and immediately locate a cute little retaurant called Bedlam Street where we installed ourselves for lunch and a glass of wine. Bedlam advertises itself on its sign and menus as "Bedlam Street Fish and Clam Company". Ironically there was not a clam to be found on the menu and frankly, the fish was pretty sparse, too. I mean, come on -- you're right on the north shore of Long Island and you can't scare up a couple of decent fish dishes? I think the restaurant needs to consider a re-branding exercise: "Bedlam Street -- Nary a Sea Creature Company".

This was also the first time in my life (that I can recall, anyway) where we actually sent back the wine because it had turned and tasted no better than a fruity variety of vinegar. Ugh. (Side note: The ENTIRE time we were having lunch, little Tad the Maltese was in his sherpa bag/dog carrier under the table and didn't make a peep until we were standing up to leave... and even then, the waitress thought it was little Ryan who was "barking". Ha!)

After lunch and a leisurely stroll around the quaint main streets of this little hamlet, we wound our way around to the other side of the inlet where we spread out picnic blankets on the lawn of the Teddy Roosevelt mansion, Sagamore Hill, and enjoyed WAY too many of Sia's homemade chocolate chip cookies and then got organized to trek down to the beach.

How many grown-ups does it take to fasten together one snuggly for one 5 month-old to be safely transported to the beach? You don't want to know, trust me. Poor wee Ryan was infinitely patient as Reny, Sia and I tried to hook together this baby-carrying contraption so Nick could be a hands-free dad on the walk to the beach. I have no idea what they thought I could contribute to the process since I'm clearly a rookie, but after a number of attempts, and laughing 'til we cried, we finally got it right and Ryan seemed moderately tolerant of the whole situation.

I was back in the city Saturday night and less than 24 hours later, I was back in the car, stopping at LGA to pick up Debra and off we went to Southampton for a two-day management off-site. I was looking forward to going to the Hamptons, but frankly, since I only really the saw the inside of our meeting room at the Southampton Inn, we might as well have stayed in the middle of Manhattan. I can't wait to go back and explore -- I got just enough of a taste to be even more intrigued by the area.

Global Warming?

Ok, not to jinx things or anything, but it's October and it's still really quite beautiful in New York. Warm, sunny days. No turning leaves yet. I'm pretty thrilled about this whole situation. Hot, sweaty, humid days are behind us for another summer and we are now in this brief (not TOO brief, I hope) idyllic period where the mornings are crisp and fresh and the days peak in the 70's, still allowing lunch and dinner on sidewalk patios, but not necessitating a fresh swipe of deodorant every time you step outside.

I heart NY in the fall.